Oh Lord, my heart is so heavy tonight.  The past few days have been difficult ones in some different ways.  And yet, I have seen the ways You have blessed me and my family in the midst of it all.  You never said it would be easy, you only said we’d never go alone.  And for that, Father, I give you all the glory and the praise.  You are my King and you are greater than any sorrow here on earth.  And yet, we do experience grief and sorrow…loss and pain.  Father, we are grateful for our sorrow because it gives us a chance to stop and look around ourselves.  It gives us a chance to be absolutely vulnerable and to focus and connect with You, our mighty creator, and others.  I’ve learned through the past 4 months that I have been able to connect to others in ways I never would have humbled myself to do so before.  Not because I didn’t want to, but because before I went through my miscarriage, I didn’t know how to connect in that way.  In my weakness during this time I was able to realize the strength of others to help carry me along the way with You.  That I could open up and talk about things in my time and even when I thought I wasn’t ready, and others would just listen.  Father, through this I was able to allow others to work as Your hands and feet to simply show Your sweet love to me and Doug.  I wouldn’t have experienced that if not for this time in my life.  I’ve also experienced Your peace in my heart in a way that I have never felt before.  You are such an amazing God to extend to us Your love, and mercy, and sweet grace in all times of our lives.  It is You, within whom we can firmly place our trust and our hope and our faith.  Thank you Father, for the times we don’t understand.  For the times we must solely rely on Your guiding hand.  Times when we are at our absolute weakest, bearing all before you, clinging to Your holy hand.  Oh, Father, thank you for Your son, Jesus Christ.  For loving us so much, Father, that we could only strive to desire You more each and every moment.  And that You reveal Yourself and Your blessings in our very darkest times when we couldn’t even conceive of a silver lining.  Praise You, Lord.  Praise You.


There is a song out right now, new, by Laura Story called “Blessings” and I’ve been meaning to post about it for quite some time and I just haven’t.  With the miscarriage, a beautiful friend of mine texted me one day and shared this song with me…and then another friend, and another.  Oh, how we are given beautiful, Godly friends to love on us and lift us in prayer and support us, even when they themselves can’t fully understand the darkness we are in, or how truly bright the love and light of God is shining through them to us when they say the little things.  I wish I had penned the lyrics to this song, and in my nights and days of tears, I feel I easily could have…here are the beautiful words to the song “Blessings”…I hope it blesses you, as it has me.

“We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we’d have faith to believe

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,
It’s not our home

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise”

Just beginning to experience His abundant blessings,
Valerie

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